Headlines

These headlines are real ... they have all been discovered on Internet news sites.

Trump and Ali Baba's Jack Ma plan to create 1 million U.S. jobs

Apple seeks to expand manufacturing in Arizona

Booker to testify against fellow Senator [Sessions] in unprecedented move ...

LA needs to borrow millions to cover legal payouts ...

'Clock Boy' loses in court, father's defamation lawsuit dismissed

Majority of Americans believe that Russia was behind DNC hack

Congressional Black Caucus to re-hang anti-cop 'Police are Pigs' painting in Capitol

Washington [DC] City Council considers 'sanctuary city' status.

Wat? Pelosi: Obamacare was 'bipartisan' legislation

Obama administration makes desperate play to save transgender bathrooms

Turkey continues to accuse USA of supporting ISIS ...

Kim Kardashian's chauffeur arrested for 'inside job' in Paris armed robbery

What Rules?

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Consequences

President Obummer and a phalanx of pissants have stated that global warming is at the root of terrorism ,,, see: Washington Post Story? This sounds logical to me ... and leads me to disclose the following other consequences I've uncovered of our planet's heating up 0.74 degrees Celsius over that last 110 years.

- Many of the best Hollywood actors and actresses of the 1940s and 1950s have passed away
- Pope Francis has donated all the Vatican's vast treasure to Save the Whales (he hasn't?)
- Michelle Obama's school lunches have made our kids thin (could also be because they don't eat them)
- Transgender bathrooms have been conscripted
- Lady Gaga invented twerking out of desperation
- China has decided to turn the entire South China Sea into a military base and amusement park
- Tipper Gore has divorced Al Gore (could also be because he lost the chad war)
- The U.S. economy has been stagnant for the last seven years
- Vladamir Putin of Russia keeps taking off his shirt
- HIV/AIDS has infected large swaths of the other sexes
 - President William Jefferson Clinton, against his will, became oversexed
- Blogging has become a popular way of exhibiting societal frustration

More for later once I've sobered up ...