Name Game

Ever since Bill Clinton won the presidency over George H.W. Bush, the candidates with the fewer letters in their last name generally have won at the polls — Bush over Gore (tie), Bush over Kerry, Obama over McCain, Obama over Romney and, finally, Trump over Clinton.

Before that ... there were a few modern exceptions to this rule ... Carter over Ford, Eisenhower over Stevenson, Kennedy over Nixon and Raegan over Carter ... all of which can be explained away due to extenuating circumstances.

If this loopy trend holds, the only Democrat who has a chance against a Trump second term is (promising $1,000 per month per US resident) Yang ... while Biden ties. All the other possible Dem opponents ... Warren, Buttigieg, Harris, Sanders, Booker, Klobuchar, O’Rourke and Castro would suck wind.

Pet Peeves

- Being made to wait forever on line at a restaurant where, once you get in, you see oodles of empty tables

- Birds that reward your bird-feeder generosity by pooping all over your deck

- Endless My Pillow, E.D. and personal-injury lawyer TV commercials

- Tech companies appropriating our most private data and selling it

- Melodramatic Mika,  Morning Joke and other spittle-flecked never-Trump talking heads

- Strange first names with weird spellings and apostrophes ... see: The Name Game.

- Cats that sit there looking elsewhere when you ope the door for them ... letting in the freezing air

- Restaurant wait staff who clearly look the other way when you are trying to get their attention

- Multiple belly-rubbing award ceremonies run by puffed-up glitterati for puffed-up glitterati

- Hypocrites hiding behind walls saying that walls don't work to keep us safe