Top 10 List

When Mitt Romney is inaugurated next January, these are the top 10 things that I would like to see him do in his first hours as President:

1) Kill or disable, in whatever ways possible, Obamacare.
2) Make all Obama's czars account for what they did during their tenures ... then fire them and their staffs.
3) OK the Keystone pipeline and restart all offshore drilling.
4) Fire all the political appointees in the Justice Dept. and insure that all Fast & Furious documents are not destroyed.
5) Stop all pending Energy Dept. loans and start an audit on all outstanding ones.
6) Restart the the missile defense shields in Poland and the Czech Republic.
7) Halt all foreign aid to Egypt, the Palestinian Authority, and Pakistan until and unless they accede to our demands.
8) Restore the bust of Winston Churchill to its place of honor in the White House.
9) Cut all Cabinet Dept. budgets to 2008 levels + 10%.
10) Count the White House silverware.

Saturday Night Dead

Lorne Michaels's Saturday night "comedy" show (Saturday Night Live or SNL) has had quite an impact on Presidential elections.  Effectively it killed Gerald Ford's prospects in 1977 when Chevy Chase continually depected him as a clumsy, bumbling fool.  (Side note: my wife worked part-time at NBC during this period and it was generally understood that Chevy Chase was an arrogant a-hole.)  Then, in the 2008 election, Tina Fey went a long way in destroying John McCain's campaign with her depiction of Sarah Palin as a provincial boob (excuse the expression) with "I can see Russia from my front porch."  (Many voters actually believed that the Alaskan Rogue Elephant had said that ... she hadn't.)

Now, that Mitt Romney seems to have wrapped up the Republican nomination, can we now expect that lefty hatchetman, Mr. Michaels, to try once again to enter the voting booths across the country in November and pull the levers by proxy for The Barry?  The answer is, of course.  The real question is, how will he do this?  My prediction is that it will be by either pointing out Mitt's seeming stiffness, his putting his dog's crate on the roof of his car, or his "ruthlessness" as a 1%-er while running Bain capital.  Maybe ... and probably ... all three ... possibly even some others too.  Also expect the "comedy" writers on The Late Show, The Daily Show and The Colbert Report to do much of the same ... often with a sly vengence.

Wouldn't it be great if somehow Dave Letterman, Lorne Michaels, Stephen Colbert, and Jon Stewart could also be continuously and savagely rediculed on network and cable television?  Unfortunately, it will only happen in my dreams ...

Priorities

I've recently concocted a natural taxonomy for classifying famous people.  Here are the first five priorities that I believe each of these celebrities uses to govern his/her activities and ambitions:

The Donald -- O, J, L, N, G
Hillary Clinton -- B, H, O, A, N
Dave Letterman -- O, L, H, J, G
Jay Leno -- L. J, G, H, O
The Barry -- O, A, D, H, N
Oprah -- J, B, D, L, G
Bush 43 -- G, C, N, H, A
Mitt Romney -- G, L, C, H, N
Charlie Sheen -- O, O, O, O, L
Al Gore -- O, O, J, L, H
Bill Clinton -- O, H, A, G, N
Sarah Palin -- O, N, H, G, I

And here are what these letters mean:

A - The World
B - One's Gender
C - One's Religion
D - Ones Race
E - One's Ethnicity
F - The Environment
G - One's Nation
H - One's Political Party
I - One's Region
J - One's Company
K - One's Home City/Town
L - One's Profession
M - One's Relatives
N - One's Family
O - One's Self

Have some fun and disagree with my rankings or develop your own priority profiles for other famous people.