Sanctions

President Obama has announced a new round of rigorous sanctions against the Russian Federation for its interference in the Ukraine. Even though somewhat vague, this list I am sure includes at the very least the following conscriptions:

-        The West will no longer permit the publication of any bare-chested Putin pictures.

-        Stoli vodka can no longer be sold in any flavored form inside Washington, DC.

-        Russian oligarchs cannot withdraw more than $1 billion per day from U.S. banks.

-        The U.S. intends to boycott the next Russian Winter Olympics, whenever that is.

-        Michelle Obama will no longer accompany Barack to any meetings in Russia.

-        Russian Sevruga caviar can now only be served at the White House.

-        The LA Clippers must play all their 2015 games in Moscow.

That’ll teach them.