The Students of Color Conference recently held at UCLA has been tagged by a cynic (not me) as the "Oppression Olympics" where all minorities can gather to lament their put-upon fate. Of course this suggestion prompts what some of the events might be that are held there. Here are some of the possible oppressed groups' Olympic contests:
Race Relay Race
Shiite Slalom
Hezbollah High Dive
Islamic Ice Hockey
Giant Gender Slalom
Marijuana Marathon
Cross-dresser Cross Country
Gun Shot Putdown
Transgender Taekwondo
Caitlyn Jenner Memorial Decathlon
Jewish Javelin
Bisexual Biathlon
LSD High Hurdles
Sunni Ski Jump
Allahu Akbar Alpine Combined
LGBT Long Jump
Polish Pole Vault
Dashiki Dash
You are welcome to add your own suggestions ...
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