- Cut back on my blogging ... no more than five posts per day
- Refuse to perform at Trump's inauguration
- Avoid publicly blaspheming Mohammad
- Don't buy any more My Pillows
- Oust Obummer and Hellary from squatting in my head
- Try to be more objective about Trump ... no more love tweets
- Order a 'Diplorable' tee shirt
- Learn how to drive a monster truck
- Swear off of Pop Tarts and Fruit Loops
- Exercise at least once a month
- Reduce my carbon and molybdenum footprints
- Time to stop break dancing
