Guilty!

Who inspired the killing of 5 newspaper people in Annapolis? DONALD TRUMP

Why did Joe and Mika have a lover's spat recently?  DONALD TRUMP of course

Who was responsible for not picking up the garbage on the upper east side of Manhattan last Monday?  DONALD TRUMP naturally

Whose signature was found in thee Library of Congress' copy of "Mein Kompf?"  DONALD TRUMP

Why was Maxine Waters' dry cleaning not ready on Friday?  It seems DONALD TRUMP

Who caused Chipolte's  multiple cases of food poisoning last year?  DONALD TRUMP!

Why did Johnny not do his homework yesterday?  DONALD TRUMP

Who didn't clean up for their dog at the dog park?  That evil man, DONALD TRUMP

Why did 11  pilot whales wash up on the Chatham beach in early June?  DONALD TRUMP

Why did Jack and Jill fall down the hill.  DONALD TRUMP is guilty

Headlines

Pun Translation: Booze Cruise

These headlines are real ... they have all been discovered on Internet news sites:

CA to teach LGBT curriculum -- to 2nd graders

Protester Lights Himself on Fire While Trying to Burn American Flag

[Joy] Behar: 'Republican Party platform is like Mein Kampf'

Michael Moore: 'Trump is going to win'

New homeowners find dead body in bathroom

'Black Lives Matter' leader recommends 'don't vote'

Tesla stock falls after Musk 'Master Plan' unveiled

NBA moves All Star Game out of North Carolina due to Bathroom Law

L.A. times suggests militdary coup against President Trump

Mark Cuban lashes out at Trump ... calls him 'loud guy in the suit'

Chicago: 33 shot in one day

Restaurant slammed for 'BLACK OLIVES MATTER' ...

Aunt Bee

Remember when Opie Taylor's Aunt Bee (Madeleine Notatalbright) was Secretary of State under Slick Willie ... perhaps I should rephrase that? Well anyway, she did vouch for her predator boss when he was accuses of sex crimes ... and she did recently say that there is a "special place in hell" for a woman who doesn't vote for this sex criminal's enabler, Hellery Clinton. And now this once diplomatic czar has said a very undiplomatic thing ... that e-mails never killed anyone. What? This pin-wearing pin-head said that "nobody is going to die because of what happened on e-mails"? See: Daily Caller Video.

Yes, Aunt Bee, just like books never killed anyone ... say like Mein Kampf or Das Kapital?